No news yet and I’m trying not to think about it. For starters, I’m nervous. I [...]]]> Seriously, you are all too nice to me. It’s kind of surreal to read all your wonderful comments and I cannot believe you guys have moved my video to the number one spot of Food Network Star Entries!

No news yet and I’m trying not to think about it. For starters, I’m nervous. I mean, me? a reality girl? Noooo That’s just weird! Second, I really don’t have the cooking chops, I have a lot to learn and (if, HUGE IF, I got on) I’d probably get demolished on the cooking side of the competition.

Anyway *trying not to think about it* *trying not to think about it* back to this "spoil" thing. I’ve had a rough couple of days. The husband and I had a little tiff, the toddler has been getting on my last nerve and some people are really pissing me off!

Excuse the frankness but boy oh boy! I really do my best to do, well… my best, in everything I do. But lately I’ve been getting so much darn resistance. Know what I mean? Like getting snippy emails when I’m trying to be honest, or going out of my way to do something nice for someone and having it blow up in my face. It really makes me want to crawl into a little hole and just stop trying.

But then I read your comments, I realize I made a difference in someone life and it makes me smile! I think this is why I’m so drawn to the blogging. I love sharing my ideas, I love connecting and I LOVE inspiring and helping people reach goals. I never really looked at it as a passion but it really is. And the great thing is here I can share, connect and help people who want to do the same. If they do want to they don’t have read. It’s really like a perfect utopia, isn’t it?

Am I making any sense? I think I may have officially gone into babble mode.

Anyway, to help shut the door on my slump, I’m going to focus on the positives (besides how cool you all are ;~P) as I found THAT is the best way to deal. So today’s positives…

• I had the BEST workout this morning. I totally splurged and hired a personal trainer at the gym. Not because I have to but because I want to. Here’s what happened…. I recently left the Y and signed up at Bally’s for a few reasons but mostly due to location. With the new membership came a free personal trainer session. Well, I totally took advantage and fell in love. Not with the guy (although he’s really nice ;~P) but with the workout. Dude, he kicked my butt! and I love having someone there to spot me, set a routine, assess my goals, and do all the things that a trainer does! We are going to meet ones a week and he’s helping with a plan for the marathon. Plus I want to work on getting some muscle tone. I can totally see muscles in my arms and back and I’m liking it! LOL I updated my workout page with a loose shedule of my training schedule (holy crap I have a training schedule!)
• I ate really good today (except I’m munching a bit too much on some pretzels right now). Not because I stayed in my points but because I made everything homemade and that felt really good. We’ve been eating out a lot and I’m trying to get us back into the habit of looking in the fridge first. So today I made the husband and I some cheese steaks out of leftovers. SO YUMMY! and I made an awesome dinner (although the husband didn’t fall for the bulgur trick. LOL I tried to make bulgur instead of rice and he tried it but he wasn’t the biggest fan)
• The husband and I totally had a great talk and worked out the problems we had this weekend. That always relieves some stress and makes me feel TONS better. :~) I just feel off and we are off. I’m sure you know what I mean.
• The toddler, albeit miserable lately (last two dinners he’s be sent to timeout) I (and the husband) have NOT given in. So I’m hoping this too shall pass. :~) We’ll see.

I have so many other things to do and tell ya about but I’m SO tired. Just to keep myself honest and the ideas fresh…. book review, coupon giveaway, VitaTop giveaway, Chicago announcement, and T-Shirts. Yikes! I have a busy week ahead! :~)

Here’s the menu…

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This morning I hit the gym and worked my arse off for 2 hours. Boy does that do wonders for the soul too. :~)

Now, on [...]]]> OK… 1.) I feel TONS better. Thank you SO much for your comments. I think part of me just had to post that as some kind of therapy. :~)

This morning I hit the gym and worked my arse off for 2 hours. Boy does that do wonders for the soul too. :~)

Now, on this this Food Network Star update.

Amy let me know my video was up The Next Food Network Star page. I had NO idea! LOL

I’m super excited about this as I really thought my chances were over after the casting call! But now I have some renewed hope!

I hate to ask a favor but please, PLEASE check out the video and if you feel so inclined leave a comment on their site (there’s an area under the video). Maybe I can get their attention if it’s viewed a lot?? Right? I figure it’s worth a shot! RIGHT? :~)

Ok, I’m off to the shower to dream about TV stardom! HA! Oh! and I just posted a quick idea on GreenLiteBites, Ramen Noodle "Chili". So YUMMY and SO full for 6 points!

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Beside the book, I experimented a bit in the kitchen, caught up on some blog [...]]]> I FINALLY finished a chapter in my cookbook today. I can’t believe it. Only 4 more to go! Ugh! Why didn’t anyone tell me how time consuming it was going to be! I have to admit though, it’s fun.

Beside the book, I experimented a bit in the kitchen, caught up on some blog reading, posted the first step in my series and even got a morning run in (more on that in a bit). Plus, the toddler and I had a great breakfast, an after dinner dancing session and a great game of freeze tag in the AutoZone Parking lot while waiting for the husband’s battery to be changed. Have you every tried to play freeze tag with only 2? it’s quite interesting. :~P

At least I’m staying active as my workout routine has been quite disrupted over the past week or so. I haven’t lifted in over a week and I never got my 60 minute run in before my relay in the marathon which is THIS SATURDAY! *nail biting*

This mornings run was fun and although I could have physically kept running, mentally I was spent. This is why I have a problem running in the morning. My brain starts ticking about my "to do list", I get distracted and then I want to stop so I can get my day started. Am I the only one with this problem?

Gragh is a screen shot from the Nike+ web site

(pssst…. notice my last mile pace! :~)

Anyway, other news….

• There seems to be some confusion on the Next Food Network Start thing. Here’s the deal. I went to the casting call, they said they were doing call backs by the next morning. I didn’t get one. I decided to record an audition video anyway and I sent it in yesterday. So I guess you can say there’s still a chance although I’m not holding my breath. At this point I have done all I can.
• I may be traveling to Chicago for a special blogger meet up. It hasn’t been confirmed so I don’t want to share too much about the weekend yet. As soon as I find out all the details I will blog about it!
• The next few days promise to be CRAZY! Doctors appointment, new project kick-off meeting, and a meeting with "the designer" about the t-shirts and cook book. Not to mention I have to pick up my race pack, figure out all the race details, meet my parents on Sunday for a family outing AND get ready for the BlogHer Reach Out Tour for Monday. Umm yea… I should get some sleep now! :~)

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Let’s think about that for a minute.

The more times you try, the more likely you are to be successful. Why does that [...]]]> Remember the old quite smoking ads? The ones that said the more times you try to quit, the more likely you are to be successful the next time you try.

Let’s think about that for a minute.

The more times you try, the more likely you are to be successful. Why does that that only have to be associated with smoking? Why not Weight loss? Or learning to use "the potty" (can you tell I have a 3 year old?) Really, if we think about it, it applies to everything we want to do in this life. It’s not that different then the old adage of if you don’t first succeed try, try again. Which, I guess I could have made this weekend’s quote, but instead I chose one from Thomas Edison,

I have not failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.

This is such a great way to think and it supports my point on mindset. It is really easy for us to accept failure and let it defeat us. It’s much harder to change your perspective and look at failure as just an attempt that didn’t work. The one thing we have in this life is how we approach situations. Do we give up after one try? Do we accept defeat? Do we wallow if our own self pity?

You know I normally write posts for myself but try to make them relative to everyone, right? For some reason that inspires me. It makes me look outside of myself and approach what I’m going through from another perspective. Hopefully making myself a better person in the process and inspiring you along the way. That’s really my intention when I write for the blog.

Well I’ve been in a funk all day. I can’t believe how much not getting that call back affected me. I don’t know what I expected to happen. Maybe to be "discovered" on the spot? For them to tell me "I’ve made it through the next round" after a 5 minute conversation? Nothing is that easy. The weight loss wasn’t. Maintaining sure isn’t. You guys just gave me a big head with all your fabulously supportive and flattering comments! :~P

I’m not sure where this leaves me. But I’m not going to be down about it anymore. AND I’m sure not going to be seeking any more comfort in food! I actually dug in the pantry and pulled out a bag of chocolate chips just for a "happy fix". Yikes!

I’m over it and you know what? I’m going to do an audition video and send it in to the Food Network. They aren’t going to get rid of me THAT easy! I just have to find another way that works. ;~)

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If you haven’t figured it out, this impatience is being caused by the casting call yesterday. I am SO glad I went! It was fun to take [...]]]> I’m not a good "waiter". I hate waiting. Especially when what I’m waiting for is out of my control. I guess you can call that impatience. :~)

If you haven’t figured it out, this impatience is being caused by the casting call yesterday. I am SO glad I went! It was fun to take the train into the "city". I hopped on the metro, and arrived about an hour early. There weren’t many people there and I was relived I wouldn’t be on an American Idol style line! I really had no idea what to expect.

People started trickling in and I started to realize everyone was just as nervous as I. I also realized most people there were very similar to me. They weren’t trained chefs or best selling cookbook authors, most were every day "folk" who cooked for fun and wanted to take a shot. There were a few professionals, of course but I didn’t feel outnumbered or like I didn’t belong.

I even showed GreenLiteBites to a few of my casting call buddies and they seemed impressed. Of course more impressed by the toddler but hey, he’s got cuteness on his side. :~)

So after waiting about an hour they started to call us in one by one. No one knew what to expect and no one came back after being called to give us an inside scoop. While waiting I had some great conversations and met some awesome people. Even brushing shoulders with internet celebrity with Jolene. We had an awesome conversation about the internet and "she" gave me some great advice.

I also met Amy from EatingLow.com. She was awesome and gave me a lot of pointers on the cookbook front. Plus she is also a weight loss success story so we had a special bond. :~)

With all these great conversations the time flew by and all of sudden MY name was being called. Boy was I nervous. I handed over my application got a picture snapped and then I was introduced to "the interviewer". Yes, yes, I forgot her name (I’m SO bad at that, ESPECIALLY when I’m nevous) so she will now be known as the interviewer. :~)

The first words out of my mouth were, "ohhh this isn’t too bad, I thought it would be way more intimidating". To which the interviewer replied, "Everyone says that!".

We then proceeded to have a nice conversation. I told her about GreenLiteBites and Roni’s Weigh. I showed her my latest video and a few food photos and then the big question came…

DUN DUN DUN

Why do you want to be the Next Food Network Star?

You’d think I’d have my answer ready, right? I was so focused on my "culinary point of view" that for the last 2 days I didn’t even think WHY I wanted to do this. I just did it! LOL

My response was along the lines of inspiring people to eat healthier, showing them that it’s not impossible to cook healthy meals for their families with a busy schedule. I want to share all the ideas swimming in my head because there’s tons of stuff in there and I just want to get it out! LMAO. Again she seemed mildly impressed, interested in what I had to say but not giving me any insight into whether or not I was doing well.

It literally seemed like I was only in there for 2 minutes when another women popped her head in to tell us we were over time. Good sign? Bad sign? I DO NOT know.

I shook the interviewers hand, she told me they would be doing call back that night or Saturday morning and I was on my way.

That was it. Now I’m WAITING! and it SUCKS! :~)

I tried, I had fun and I AM glad I went. I’m just not getting my hopes up especially considering I didn’t get a call last night. I’m going to try and get out of my food Network day dream and get on with this yard sale, which I am completely unprepared for! I gotta RUN!

I will twitter IF I get call. I promise.

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I’m slightly distracted this Thursday morning with thoughts of a certain reality show swimming in my head but there was no way I was missing Thursday Thoughts! Now, don’t get impatient and scroll to the bottom, I have some good link this Thursday!

It’s so funny [...]]]> Last week I weighed in for the first time in weeks and I was happy that my weight was still within a very respectable maintainer range. I’m not quite sure why this surprised me, my clothes all fit great. I’m working out like a madwomen. I’m even training for the relay.

It’s so funny that I still grapple with the thought that somehow I’m going to gain 50lbs overnight. Like that the cheesecake I ate this weekend will translate into at least a 5 lb gain. It’s like I ignore the fact that I workout 4-5 days a week, HARD. That I can easily run 3-4 miles and that I’m consciously aware of everything I put in my mouth. I am not at all the same person I was 5 years ago. I can say confidently that I’m in the best shape of my life. I truly have changed my (sorry, I have to use it) lifestyle.

Why did all these feelings come to the surface tonight? Well, I weighed in again this morning and the scale showed a 1.2 loss. I was shocked. Then I had a long talk with myself which ended with a one statement….

Trust yourself. You are doing it and you will continue to.

OK, enough soul searching and back patting. I have a big decision to make. Well I guess it’s not "big" per say but definitely FUN. I just found out the Food Network is doing an open casting for the Next Food Network Star this friday! It’s only an hour from my house and I’m seriously considering going.

I’m not sure I have what it takes but I love working on GreenLiteBites, I’m fairly obsessed with food and I LOVE to cook, so why not, right? RIGHT? OK, I’m trying to convince myself.

The life lover in me is screaming "YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE! GO" The negative nilly is saying, "Why bother, you have so much work to do and you chances are pretty slim anyway."

I guess this is were I ask what you think. Although I have a feeling all comments will tell me to go as it’s the "nice" thing to say. Is anyone willing to be really truthful and tell me I’m crazy? If I decide to go I have a lot of work ahead of me to get ready! I better run!

I can’t focus anyway, the only thing swimming in my head right now is… "What’s my culinary point of view???" LMAO

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