So ummmm … yeah … I fell off the planet. Well, at least that’s how it felt to me. I haven’t posted since Monday (longest non-blogging stretch every for me I think). I stopped checking my email. I DIDN’T stop posting photos on IG (because it’s just so much fun!) but I did stop checking other social media sites.
I just needed a break. I’ve been struggling. And I don’t mean in the weight-loss realm — although I usually do medicate with food — I mean in the LIFE realm.
Earlier last week I saw this and almost broke into tears.
I feel like I’ve been “holding it together” for so long I forgot how not to, if that makes any sense.
So while at the beach I decided to let go. I soaked up everything! The beach, the ocean, the rides, the games, the family time, the kids, the husband, everything!
I didn’t need to run or food journal or even reflect on my days.
I just let myself BE and it was exactly what my soul needed.
I took early-morning walks with these two.
We did some serious beach playing.
It was an absolute blast.
Although there were some whiny too — 4 is a trying age in my opinion.
But oh so fun as we were able to do so much more together this year!
Thursday and Friday I found two different yoga on the beach classes and seized both of them.
The instructors were awesome and each class gave me something I needed.
Especially Friday’s when this poem was shared:
Maybe there’s no box to think outside.
Maybe there’s no lock, no door, or key.
Perhaps there’s just the scared, small me
holding tight to turf that isn’t mine,
trying to be somebody.
I struggle for release.
I seek and strive,
all the while failing to see the obvious.
The only walls in front of me are those I’ve built myself,
the fortress of my personality so well defended it seems impenetrable.
What I create, I can take down –
or maybe I am free right now.
That really spoke to me. I’ve always been my own worst enemy. I think a lot of us are.
OK, I’m not going to do that blogger thing where I make some grand plans or new goals at the end of this post. I’m not “starting fresh” or putting a new plan into action. There is nothing to do or work on or prove (to myself).
This is going to sound cheesy and, well, ad-like but it’s true… I’m just going to keep doing what What I Can When I Can. It’s all I got.