I can honestly say I will NOT be weighing in today.
If everything is going as planned, I should be floating down the Green River in northwestern Colorado with The 8-Year old at this very moment!
I don’t know how to say this without sounding like a raving lunatic: I don’t care what the damn scale says, THIS — living life without letting my body image or weight get in the way — has always been my ultimate goal. And I am doing it RIGHT NOW!
Lord knows I’m well outside my comfort zone, far away from home, on my own, with my child, experiencing something I never experienced.
I didn’t HAVE to lose weight to do the things I’m doing now but it’s been a big part of my journey. When I was younger, my bad body image initially had me on a different path. One where I would eat out sadness, guilt, and fear. Back then I shied away from doing things because I didn’t think I was worthy. It was easier to stay safe and hidden in my cocoon of fat. Blaming it for my unhappiness, getting distracted by quick-fix attempts to lose it, and thinking by doing so, it would solve all my problems.
How little I knew.
I had it all wrong and COMPLETELY backwards.
I had to solve my problems FIRST. Learn to be happy FIRST. Love myself FIRST. Then weight loss was possible.
Then ANYTHING was possible, IS possible.
I hope you (and I) are having a great week! Looking forward to all your updates when I get home. I hope this makes sense when I re-read it after my pre-vacation high. :)