For those that don’t know, I’m married to a sleeper. The Husband is INFAMOUSLY the worst (or best, depending on how you look at it) sleeper in the world. He could easily stay in bed 12-13 hours sleeping peacefully with World War III happening outside his window.
Ok, that may be a stretch but still… The dude can SLEEP!
I’m not a bad sleeper. I can sleep. It’s the waking up thing I have issue with. Once I’m up, I’m up. I shy away from calling myself a morning person because I don’t like to get up, I just can’t sleep past a certain time or when anyone else is awake in the house.
Basically, The Husband and I are complete opposites (with more than this I might add.) He can and will sleep-in until someone drags him out of bed and I can’t sleep-in even when given the opportunity.
Because of this I have always been on “morning duty” in the house. I make breakfast, get the kids dressed and start the day for everyone. The Husband? Well he sleeps in until the last possible moment and then, in return, handles all evening routines including, bath, bed time stories, etc.
This exchange works for us.
Well, workED for us.
Now there’s a class I want to take 3 days a week in the morning that’s right smack dab in the middle of breakfast, bus top time, and day care drop off.
At first I was hesitant to ask The Husband. Partially because our routine has worked for us for so long I don’t want to disturb it, and partially because I’ve learned not to deal with the husband before a certain time in the AM. It’s just not worth it or the argument that generally results.
I also don’t like the idea of changing everyone’s routine for, well, me. I’m always the flexible one. I’m the one who doesn’t mind waking up early. I’m the one who will skip a class if something pops up. I’m the one who never asks anyone for anything. Doing so makes me uncomfortable and self-conscious.
But I REALLY want to take this class! (it’s CrossFit in case you are wondering.) I’ve been unmotivated to workout and a new class may just be what I need to get back my spark.
So I bit the bullet and ran my new schedule idea by the husband. Basically informing him that he would have to go from no responsibilities in the morning to walking up over an hour earlier, getting Ryan on the bus, and dressing/feeding Evan breakfast before dropping him off at preschool.
Umm yea, I didn’t think it would go over too well either.
But it DID! And this morning was day 1 of our new routine.
I made a quick breakfast for Ryan and then headed to my new CrossFit class. The Husband took care of everything else.
And guess what…
No one died!
It wasn’t the big deal I WAS making it out to be.
For some reason I’m wired NOT to ask for help and when I do, I feel guilty, uncomfortable and apologetic. Part of me also wants people to see that I need a hand and just offer, but when they do I turn them away anyway!
Why? Why? Why?
When will I learn I don’t have to do it all alone?
Do You Ask for the Support You Need?