One Mom’s Journey from Fat to Skinny to Confident

ASK RONI Q&A

Ask Roni: Bragging

13 Comments 1768 views

I tried SO hard to record a podcast today. I really did. First, the phone rang, then the microwave repair guy showed up early (long story,) then the baby woke up early from nap. It was an absolute disaster. Laughable really.

I could record now, but it’s 9PM and with both kids in bed all I have energy for is this: Blogging with the laptop on the couch watching TV.

SO… I thought I’d pluck one and do it the old fashioned way. This question came in from Michelle…

Clearly, you had no trouble about sharing your weight loss journey, since you know, wrote a blog. But now a days social media is so prevalent. How much is over share? Like today, I made my first real post on Facebook about the journey I am on, and I almost did not post it, because it felt like I was fishing for complements. I will also admit to thinking the same thing of friends who have done the same (although it was after the like fourth post of the day of a similar nature) I feel awkward about it.

braggingI love love love this question and I could answer it with one little quote…

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

Any time I’m worried about sharing an accomplishment or an opinion I think of that quote. It reminds me there will always be people who "mind" regardless of what I say or do, so why filter?

I really think it comes down to owning your accomplishments. You can call it "bragging" but it comes from a different place. When you share your weight loss or workouts or healthy food choices it’s pride, not arrogance. Sure if you went around saying things like…

"HA! I lost 2 pounds this week and you didn’t! nanny nanny poo poo."

you’d be an arrogant braggart but if you say…

"Hey guys, proud of myself this week, I lost two pounds!"

What’s wrong with that? Who’s going to have a problems with that?

You know who will? Those that are jealous, bitter or just plain jerks.

I read the most amazing blog post a few months ago by The Feminist Breeder called The World Needs More Women Who Brag About Their Accomplishments. It’s a must read and I share her thoughts EXACTLY….

Confidence is contagious, and should be threatening to no one.  Own your achievements.  Love them, AND yourself.

It’s really that simple. Whether you earn a degree, get a promotion, lose a pound, run your first mile, cook a healthy dish or make a healthy choice, OWN IT.

Image source



Leave a comment

I’d love to hear your story or thoughts on mine.

However, to prevent the massive amounts of spam I was receiving I have turned off comments on any post older than 5 days old. If you'd like to leave me a note regarding this post or anything really try me on twitter (@RoniNoone,) my Facebook page, or even IG (@RoniNoone) I'm so sorry for the inconvenience. I never thought I'd have to do this but it's gotten way out of hand and comment management has become simply too time consuming to manage.

Discussion

There are 13 comments so far.

    Joplin

    November 18, 2011

    Oh Roni, I so needed this. Thank you for inspiring me…yet again. :)

    Cindy

    November 18, 2011

    Wow, Roni! What a powerful post. Thank you for taking the time to answer Michelle’s question so eloquently. I really admire your sensibility and the ease to which you relate to all of us. Sounds like you are getting your groove back. Enjoy your evening. I’m glad you are taking some time for yourself to relax and unwind after such a hectic day, but even more glad you found the time to share this question with all of us.

    Bonnie Richmond

    November 18, 2011

    I think though, that the reason your blog attracts so many is that you also show us your human(ness), that you’re not perfect, that you also have your struggles. That makes us feel that we are not alone in our own struggles. And to borrow a biblical quote, “Philippians 3:14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus”, you keep pressing on, even though you have struggles…sometimes daily. And you are overall successful. Thank you for your inspiration, Roni. Yes, you hear from people about how you inspire, but some day when you get to heaven, you’ll realize truly how many you have inspired that don’t post it now.

    Mary

    November 18, 2011

    Love this post Roni….thanks!

    Kelly W

    November 18, 2011

    Love it!

    susan

    November 18, 2011

    I agree Roni. I was literally ostracized from my group of “friends” when I expressed joy in losing 50 pounds after being overweight most of my adult life, and this was expressed with no jibes or jabs at anyone else’s struggle to lose weight.It was pure joy and a huge sense of accomplishment.

    And yet, when they lost so much as half a pound,it was blogged/tweeted/trumpeted all the time-yes, they had a right to do so, and I didn’t mind that, but rather what hurt me was that the one time I expressed my happiness with my own success, it was seen as boastful and proud….double standards! Love the “those who mind don’t matter/those who matter dont’t mind” quote, when applied on both sides of the aisle!

    LG

    November 18, 2011

    I saw that Phillipians quote on Biggest Loser the other day…a man named Antone had gotten a scrapbook from his family and the reference was on the bottom of it! :0)

    RG

    November 18, 2011

    I think that advice is insanely brilliant. However, not all of us have the confidence to rock that. I’m sure it helps to have a separate weight loss blog from facebook. Otherwise, I’ve become selective in who I share with. I think some of the others are jealous, but I also think that a whole lot of people just don’t care about the stupid scale. There’s a freedom in that, they may not be throwing a parade if I lose 2 pounds, but they’re also not staging an intervention if I gain 5.

    Tami

    November 18, 2011

    You have no idea how much I needed to read this today. I am not a person with a lot of self confidence and I often second guess what I have said to others in person. I even second guess what I post on my blog even though I rarely click on publish with out careful consideration of what I have written.

    I was struck by how you pointed out the difference between “bragging” and being “proud.” That makes so much sense to me.

    Own your own achievements — that is sound advice. We seem to have no problem accepting the blame or guilt and telling others about that, so why is it so hard to share our success?

    Thanks Roni!

    Roz@weightingfor50

    November 18, 2011

    Hi Roni. REALLY REALLY love the last quote. I may print it and pin it on my workstation. Happy Friday

    Robyn @ New Every Morning

    November 18, 2011

    I like having a blog for this reason. It’s mine. Yes, others can read it, but they don’t have to. I’m not forcing anyone to do so. So, if I want to pat myself on the back for a job well done and winning a long-standing battle with the scale, I can do it, because it’s my corner of the bloggerverse to do it. And if others don’t like it, they can forget my blog address.

    But I love that you share both your accomplishments AND your struggles, Roni, because that’s a realistic view point. No one is going to fly through life without at least one hiccup at some point, so knowing the real deal with you – when you’re honest about what’s going on, as you are so much of the time (everyone keeps SOMETHING to themselves, but that’s not a matter of honesty, just a matter of privacy), it’s a very relate-able experience that you share with readers.

    Kate

    November 19, 2011

    Love this response – it’s awesome.

    My bragging for today is that I tackled my first pumpkin cheesecake last night and it is not bad – not super but for a first try pretty gosh darn good :)

    Mindy

    November 21, 2011

    It’s so hard to take pride in accomplishments because it does feel boastful. So I often don’t want to share for fear that others will think badly of me. I talked about this with a friend once and they shared something that really helped me. It’s all about balance. As long as I also share struggles and encourage others then taking pride in what I do is just a piece of the way I interact with the world around me and they will know that. It’s always easier for others to encourage when they have seen the whole journey. And it makes me feel better because it’s authentic, not just sharing the good stuff and making it sound easy when it isn’t!