One Mom’s Journey from Fat to Skinny to Confident

FOOD JOURNALS

Starting 2009 Off Blind and Running

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First let me say I took it easy on myself this week. You may have noticed No Question of the Week and no Thursday Thoughts. Don’t worry I will be back next week with those regular features, promise. :) I just needed a break.

If you’ve been following my previous posts so you know about my struggles this holiday season. I don’t know what was up with me. I definitely gained. I can see it. I can feel it. I’m not surprised. My activity plummeted this month (combination of not running in the cold and a busy holiday season) and my eating skyrocketed.

I’d be motivated one day and stuffing myself the next. It was weird.

Well not that weird. I definitely could see the start of bad cycle happening. Actually I described it like this a few days ago it’s so true…

You feel like crap because you ate like crap. Yet you want to continue to eat crap because you already ate the crap.

Stupid, right?

So I decided to break the "crap" cycle. Yesterday I went to Weight Watchers for a meeting and a weigh in. I knew I needed to go but I really didn’t want to see the number on the scale. I was worried it would effect me too much and I didn’t want to "feel like crap" all over again. I was working too hard to pull myself out of the cycle.

My solution was to weigh in blind. I asked the receptionist to just jot the number down and not tell me. Not a word. I didn’t want to know. Right now my weigh-in book is securely stored in my purse and I refuse to look at it until next week when I go to weigh in again. And I WILL be going to weigh in again. I NEED the accountability.

So far my little plan is working. I’ve been motivated since that meeting. Yesterday I had a little get together and made some hummus with fresh veggies and shrimp cocktail. Today, thanks to my friend Carrie, I ran a 5k this afternoon. I was planning on a run anyway so when she called I was all over it. What a great way to start the New Year!

My at New Years 5k

I didn’t do half bad either. Running 3 miles in 30 minutes and that was with a few slow downs (dropped my kids, slow start – no chip).

I am SO glad I did it. I had a BLAST and it gave me the running bug back. My running really plummeted in December with the cold weather but I’m totally ready to start my training for the 1/2 and full marathons. Which by the way, I’m working on my training schedule. I plan on posting it, along with my 2009 goals, to a separate page tomorrow. I’ll keep you posted.

Other then the 5K I actually took down my Christmas Tree today. As bad as it sounds if I don’t take it down early I start to get depressed. Normally we wait until the weekend after New Years but both the husband and I had a shot of motivation this morning. Honestly, with the toddler helping, we had more fun taking it down then we did putting it up! No busted string lights to worry about! :~P

Overall I couldn’t have asked for a better New Years Day. How about you? How’s ’09 treatin’ ya so far?

Here’s my first menu of ’09.

Food Units
yelatin and mango… toddler and i had a blast making it this morning. 2
the rest of the turkey soup – it was a bit extra 5
a few leftover cold shrimps 2
banana 2
huge bowl of spaghetti squash with my sauce, 1 turkey meatball, 1 turkey sausage and fruit for dessert 6
popcorn with the toddler 2
fudgy peanute butter vitatop – review coming soon 1
soy crisps with some black bean dip 4
Total: 24

Table provided by Roni’s Food Tweet, Eat, Post Generator.



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Discussion

There are 32 comments so far.

    Lane

    January 2, 2009

    Happy New Year Roni :) With all your new fitness goals and your focus, I have no doubts that 2009 will be an amazing year for you. Ive started to run lately and I’m wondering if you would share your own playlist. I need to discover new and good upbeat songs :)

    Amanda

    January 2, 2009

    Sorry I celeb-gushed at you! Hahaha. I, too, feel the “yuck” of the holiday season and can’t wait to get back to school. I seem to have more control over things there. *ponder* Congratulations on the run, and keep it up! :)

    Arlene

    January 2, 2009

    I couldn’t weigh in like that. The suspense would kill me! But I, too, have had a bad couple of weeks.

    Can’t wait to hear more about the fudgy PB Vitatop. It sounds yummy.

    And Happy New Year. I’m sure it’s going to be a great one.

    EmmaElizabeth

    January 2, 2009

    oh how crazy. i’m going to my WW mtg tomorrow and my plan was to not look at the number either. I think i get so focused with the number, that i need to just go to the mtg, be on plan and maybe after a mtg or two, look at the number and see how things turn out.

    Happy New Year!

    Bethany

    January 2, 2009

    I read your post a long time ago for the Mary Lou’s Weight Platform and I had to have one. Well, I got one for Christmas. Yay! When you were talking about how you weighed in blindly, it reminded me of that! I love that I can start out the year by not focusing on the “number”, but rather on my progress. I have already lost 5.5 pounds! Yipee!

    I think it’s so much better to focus and celebrate the successes instead of letting the number make us feel like crap! Thanks for your motivational words.

    I have been really down lately because I had to have surgery on both of my feet these last 2 months. It has really put me out of commission physically and now that I am almost done healing, your great words and this amazing scale are making me feel so much better. Thank you for reviewing it and thanks for all you do. I will continue to follow the blog well into 2009!

    Charlie Hills

    January 2, 2009

    It’s not weird at all, Roni. Not weird at all.

    While none of us ever, ever want to admit this, the fact we all know deep, deep down in our hearts (and our bellies) is that we’re never “cured” of this.

    Even if we lost all the weight we wanted — even if we kept it off — even if we told the world that years and years of yo-yo dieting is OVER — the fact is, we’re never cured. We can’t change our physiological desire to eat any more than we can will ourselves a new eye color.

    Without repeating myself too much, I’ll just post a link to my theory-in-progress: :)

    http://www.backtothefridge.com/blog/psych-out/

    Alexia

    January 2, 2009

    Looking forward to putting Christmas stuff away tomorrow. Honestly, I got some devastating news over the holidays so I would say there’s nowhere to go but up right now.

    I started my 1/2 and marathon training plans — I can totally overcomplicate things and then I end up not doing them, so, like when I did the Couch to 5K plan, I’m now doing Galloway’s marathon plan. Just give it to me and I’ll do it. (I gave myself the option of doubling the program (doing each week twice) if it’s too aggressive as-is for my weight and fitness level.)

    Natalia Burleson

    January 2, 2009

    Happy New Year Roni! I’ve done that before. Congrats on running the 5k!!! Sounds like you are back on track. :)

    Kim

    January 2, 2009

    Hi Roni…
    I have been back and forth with your page for 2.5 years now..
    I found you on the TT board. Well needless to say I have gained slowly but SURELY 26lbs since the TT. Nothing undone…Just feeling MISEARBLE!!
    TODAY…I started WW . Thanks for such a great support system.

    I have a goal..but FEELING better starts now.
    Happy New Year
    Kim

    Lou

    January 2, 2009

    Hi Roni,

    I am sure when I get to work tomorrow at WW I am going to find more just like you than not. I am glad you still have the mojo still in you, BRAVO!!! I too need to keep my focus and you definitely help me with your posts so keep up the AWESOME work and don’t get down on yourself, just motivated and START OVER! (I tend to say that a lot.)

    You touch me almost every time I read your blog. If you want to see some real people with real weight issues I recommend a series on TLC called Obesity Clinic. You just have to watch this show for 10 minutes and it will scare any of us straight. I happened to find this by chance on New Years Day just flipping channels. I very rarely even watch TV at all and this is what I found:

    http://health.discovery.com/tv/live-it/inside-brookhaven.html

    It was more scary to me than any horror movie I have ever seen.

    Rachel

    January 2, 2009

    Roni,
    What I like about your site is that you give people a realistic look at what it means to maintain weight after losing it. I think you set a very good example and I thank you for being honest, sharing your daily struggles and showing us that losing the weight does not equal bliss with no hard work. I aspire to be where you are – facing temptations and learning to find the balance that is needed to be healthy.

    Thank you,
    Rachel

    Christine

    January 2, 2009

    Happy New Year!

    You are a very busy woman, and it makes sense that during times when you are even busier, something has to give–and that thing is your eating/activity. Also, around holidays people eat more and really celebrate food, and so you get caught up in that. Eating more/moving less is perfectly normal, you know?

    The good thing is that pretty quickly you miss your usual way of eating and moving your body, and eventually get back to it! Also takes less time now to get back into the groove!

    Hope this helps!

    Cat in the hat!

    January 2, 2009

    Hey Roni,

    When I focus too much on the numbers, I too weigh in without knowing how much I’ve lost or gained. I usually just ask if I’m going in the right direction and leave my own WI journal with WW so I don’t peak. At the end of the day, what matters are your lifestyle choices. It’ll come off over time not over night.

    Keri

    January 2, 2009

    I’ve given myself a “free pass” the last 3 weeks since I was recovering from surgery and it was the Holidays. I’m very excited to get back on track starting TODAY. Even though I have diet restrictions (how I eat, not what I eat–no chewing after jaw surgery), I’m still going to start tracking points again. I haven’t done that in WEEKS.

    Thank you for your continuous motivation. I find your blog and others’ blogs more motivating than a meeting ever was. 2009 is going to be a GREAT year!

    Brandi

    January 2, 2009

    That was a very smart decision to weigh in blind. Sometimes that number can be so harsh. Good for you!! And great job on the 5k!!

    I’m starting my 1/2 marathon training too, so I look forward to hearing all about your progress :)

    Jac

    January 2, 2009

    I am impressed at you weighing in blind! (What a great idea!)

    I really wish I had the ability to go to meetings. I keep hearing how inspiring they are; and in the past they helped me greatly (as long as I was dedicated to it, at least!) I hope that the motivation stays with you!

    One of my 2009 “goals” is to run a 5k (I’m a total slug now) so I find it inspiring to read your stories about running as well! I’m glad you’ve got the running bug! Hopefully that’s a great kick off to 2009!!

    The Scale Whisperer

    January 2, 2009

    Happy New Year Roni! Great job on getting a 5K in yesterday! I’m so jealous that you actually know Carrie in real life, she’s such a doll, and is an amazing friend to me :) Good luck to you in all you do! Here’s to looking mighty fine in 2009!

    Angie

    January 2, 2009

    Great plan on the blind weigh-in. Isn’t it sometimes rediculous how much our emotions are influenced by the scale? Even when we know better, we can still let it get to us. It ticks me off! Great approach to keeping your head moving forward. :-)

    Liz

    January 2, 2009

    Congratulations on starting the new year with a 5K! That is an awesome way to break the ‘crap’ cycle :)

    debby

    January 2, 2009

    As I told another blogger, Roni, it is very encouraging when someone we consider ‘has it all together’ admits to their struggles, and then overcomes! Continue on, our fearless leader!

    fitforfree

    January 2, 2009

    Way to go on the 5K, Roni!!! Happy New Year!

    Bonnie

    January 2, 2009

    Weighing in blind was a great idea….and hey….if you had gained TOO much, they would have asked for money, so you must not have done too bad!

    At my WI this week, I am now down 1.8 below my WW goal, and next Wednesday night is my 6th week on Maintenance, so I SHOULD be hitting Lifetime next Wednesday! I hope so! If so, it took me 68 weeks to get to goal (-92.4) and 74 weeks to get to Lifetime (so far, -94.2). But I have re-evaluated, and I have planned some more goals (lose 5, or 10, or 15 more than my goal weight of 155…..150, 145 or 140….I doubt I will go any lower than that at age 53) and another goal is to lose 100 lbs., which will take me to 147.4, which is uneven, so at that point, I would have to go on to 145. We’ll see….I’m just taking it one day at a time.

    Angie

    January 2, 2009

    Nope not stupid, I know that cycle well LOL Congrats on the 5k. I know you have to feel good now. Hubs and I took our tree down last night. I just needed to get it done so I could put my focus into other things.

    As for New Year’s Day, we were under the weather and slept most of the day so it was relaxing.

    Happy New Year!

    Oh and I love the blind weigh in idea but I already peeked and was not happy at what the scale said back boo hiss. I’m over it, moving on!

    Tanya

    January 2, 2009

    Glad you’re back on the fit wagon Roni and feeling better!

    Chris

    January 2, 2009

    Happy New Year…ALL good things in 2009 for you! I love your idea of hiding the weigh in number. I bet it will not be as bad as you thought once you reveal it to yourself. You’re a good example for not being too hard on ourselves and jumping back despite eating/feeling like crap…I’ve been there too many times to tell!

    Beth

    January 2, 2009

    The weighing in blind is a great idea! I myself am in my 6 weeks of maintenance to make lifetime….and this week was week 4….over the past 2 weeks (holidays) I’ve gained 4 lbs….it’s been terrible! Like self-sabotage! I’m still under the 2 lb+ limit….but I’ve got to do something!

    Did you get signed up for the Cherry Blossom 10 miler before they closed registration?

    roni

    January 2, 2009

    Thanks all!

    Beth – I did! I did! SO excited!

    pam

    January 3, 2009

    Boy….there is something about the “NEW YEAR” isn’t there? It gives you a whole burst!!!!

    Mrsca

    January 4, 2009

    Roni you inspired me! I downloaded your excel spreadsheet for weigh ins and added a few colums – 1) Daily Steps 2) Mood!
    Love it, love it, love it! Accountability is amazing.
    Keep up the great site.

    Jennifer

    January 6, 2009

    Hey Roni… I’ve been checking your site often after reading this post because you said: “Which by the way, I’m working on my training schedule. I plan on posting it, along with my 2009 goals, to a separate page tomorrow. I’ll keep you posted.” I’m so curious to know your 2009 goals! Did you already post this somewhere and I’m just clueless? That is very likely :)

    Thomas Bailey

    January 8, 2009

    One possibility would be to use unfamiliar units for weight. If you normally use pounds, try kilograms or stones. If your measurements are normally in inches, try centimeters, as I have since 1983.

    roni

    January 8, 2009

    Jennifer… I was late but I did! :)

    Check out my goals page…http://ronisweigh.com/ronis-updates/goals

    Thanks for checking up on me! :)