This quote was inspired by Anna’s comment on my request for Question of the Week ideas. Anna said…
I believe that when I say I “can’t” do something that on some level I am really saying that i “won’t” do it (because of fear.) so my question is how do we get out of our own way and do what we know we can do?! I love the quote about we are more afraid of success than we are of failure!
I never thought about my own history in the terms Anna put it. "Old Roni" (before getting pregnant) would always say things like…
"I can’t lose weight."
"I can’t run."
"I can’t go to the gym."
"I can’t DO A PULL UP!" (sorry HAD to throw that one in there.) :~P
But the truth is exactly what Anna said. It wasn’t that I couldn’t. It was that I wasn’t.
WOW, does that make any sense?
I knew why I was fat. I knew I ate too much. I knew I was lazy. I complained about my body. I had a poor self image. I’d hide in baggy clothes, wishing, hoping, PRAYING that one day I would wake up and just be thin. Where was the magic pill, Damn IT!
Now don’t get your panties in a twist I know how all that sounds. I’m not saying my thought process was good, or right. I’m just telling you how it was to be in Roni’s head circa 1988-2004.
The funny thing is…
I COULD lose weight
I COULD run.
I COULD go to the gym.
I COULD DO A PULL UP!
IF I just tried.
I had no medical reason why I couldn’t do those things. I just wasn’t doing them. Plain and simple.
Why? Why didn’t I just do the work to "succeed"? Or as Anna so eloquently put it, why was I "in my own way"?
“Old Roni” always defined succeeding as being "thin". Having the body of some airbrushed model. If I didn’t wake up the day after I started a diet, thinner, lighter, weighing less, then I must have failed. Right?!? So why keep trying. After all, I was attempting the impossible, wasn’t I?
At that time, I didn’t realize that trying WAS the success. After reading Anna’s comment and doing a bit of (online) soul searching. I found this quote, not sure who said it first but it’s GENIUS!
You don’t try TO succeed. WHEN you try, you succeed.
How TRUE!
So, just by trying to be healthy I was successful! It all makes sense to me now. That’s a great way to describe my mindset while losing. I really stopped focusing on trying to be thin. I just wanted to learn what I could do be a healthier person for my child. I accepted myself, made small changes and did my best. That change in perspective was all the difference!
Thanks Anna for bringing me down this road. I don’t know if I even came close to addressing your original question but your comment sparked this whole post and I’m so happy I found that quote.
Hope you are all enjoying the weekend! :~)
17 Responses to Weekend Quote: Redefining Success
Leave a Reply
I Published a Cook Book!
BlogToLose
What's Cooking in my kitchen?
-
I've recently discovered the amazing combination of cheese and dried cherries. I know, it sounds weird, but seriously… good! The other day I smeared some Laughing Cow Light Swiss on Cucumber slices and then topped with a cherry. It was a fun, sweet twist on standard cheese and crackers. Well, cheese [...] -
If I was a good blogger this idea would have been published BEFORE the Super Bowl not during it. I made these today to have a little fun. Surprisingly, The Husband liked them even though he didn't eat more than one. Why? Because he's strange like [...] -
If you read my weight loss blog you know I'm battling a bit of back and neck pain right now. I'm starting to feel a little better but those first few days where rough. Being the head chef of the household, this meant we ordered in a couple of times. I'm [...] -
I'm LOVING Pinterest! I can just scroll all day long looking at food photo after food photo. I wish I had more time to peruse! (I'm RoniNoone there by the way?) The other day I pinned a Portabello Mushroom pizza and was immediately inspired. It's such a simple idea and so light. [...] -
The other day I found myself craving an Orange Julius. Are they as popular as I think they are? Growing up we had an Orange Julius at our local mall. It was always a treat for us at the end of a family shopping trip. Once I was old enough to be [...] -
So I'm a little breakfast nutty at the moment. Little Bean LOVES eggs and I find myself cooking them more and more. This morning I decided to go super light (after last nights chocolate overload) and it was totally satisfying for just over 100 calories! The trick to making [...] -
A few weeks ago I saw Chef Michael Simon make a raw kale salad on The Chew. He sliced beets up real thin and cut the kale into ribbons. Then made a vinaigrette out of red wine vinegar and olive oil. I was immediately intrigued. So far I've only [...] -
I've had this idea for a quick creamy chicken dish for a few days now. It was time to give it a shot. The whole family LOVED it. I'm not joking. The only complaint came from Little Guy who declared his hate of mushrooms yet again BUT he ate everything around them. Fine [...] -
I made this on a total whim yesterday as I had leftover avocado after feeding the baby and leftover Spaghetti squash cooked from the weekend. I roasted the squash to serve with my Chicken tips instead of potatoes and it was AMAZING! Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked. So I'm sitting there staring [...] -
It's post holiday season. You know what that means? Leftover Crescent rolls to experiment with! Every year for Thanksgiving I buy a few canisters. It's the only time I do as I can't be trusted around them. Let's just say I'd beat you in the How-Many-Crescent-Rolls-Can-You-Eat-In-One-Sitting game and leave [...] -
Last week the kids and I tried parsnips for the first time and I've made them 3 times since. I wanted to figure out the best way to roast them. Yeah, that's it, the best way to roast them. You'll buy that right? Right? The truth is, I'm obsessed. I found myself [...] -
Yesterday just felt like a good day to stuff an acorn squash. I had one sitting on my counter for quite some time and it was just begging to be cooked. Since both husband and child don't like it I made a solo meal just for me and, well, it was DELICIOUS! [...] -
I bought a fennel bulb on a whim for the holidays not knowing quite what I would do with it. Of course I forgot about until yesterday when I was rummaging through the fridge trying to figure out what I wanted to make for breakfast. I pulled it out and stared [...] -
I probably should have warned you I was taking a holiday hiatus. I've been soaking up every moment of family time imaginable these last few days, leaving no time for anything else. Not even blogging! Shocking I know. ;) So I return not with a new recipe, per se, but to [...] -
Here's a quick idea for when you find yourself with a spaghetti squash but don't quite know what to do with it. Come on. Admit it. That's happened to you too. It's sure happened to me! I roasted this squash on Sunday... [...] -
I'm not sure if this will be a crowd pleaser, but I liked it and thought I'd share in hopes it inspires you to have some fun with kale. I loved the combination of sweet pear, earthy kale, salty bacon bits and creamy hummus. The only issue with the wrap was [...] -
I'm going on day 2 of counting Weight Watcher Points and I'm already inspired to come up with light, healthy meals for myself. It's like I needed the constraint of points to motivate me. Isn't that weird? Anyway, all morning I was brainstorming what to make for lunch. I wanted something flavorful [...] -
I have a friend who patiently cleaned, peeled and cubed a fresh pumpkin and then selflessly gave me some. Scratch that, a TON! I would have never even thought of doing something like that! But now that I have it in my fridge the ideas are flowing. First, I roasted some [...] -
CHRISTMAS COOKIES! YAY! Sorry. I'm so excited! Little Guy and I had tons of fun making and decorating cookies today. It may just be my favorite part of the holiday season. I loved it when I was a kid and now I get to do it with my own kids. [...] -
This may be my simplest idea yet, but it was so tasty and satisfying I had to share. Plus you guys know I'm a Laughing Cow Community Leader so I'm all about sharing fun ways to use their products. You guys may also know how I feel about pausing and making [...] -
I made this on Thursday. THURSDAY! I hate when I can't post something I've eaten within 24 hours. It just bugs me. Not sure why, it really doesn't matter when I post it, does it? Anyway, I did whip this up to cure a pizza craving and I couldn't be happier. [...] -
It's been awhile since I jazzed up a tilapia fillet. I've breaded them before, coated them in oats, flavored them like one of my favorite drinks and topped them with a fun salsa. It was time to bring nuts into the party. You are going to think I'm crazy but I've [...] -
Fun leftover turkey idea #2! Click here for leftover turkey idea #1. I had a little Gouda leftover from this years Harvest Salad and decided to put all the same flavors from the salad into a quesadilla. I just can't get enough of the smokey gouda/sweet craisin combo. It goes [...] -
It's the day after Thanksgiving and my refrigerator ROCKS! I have leftover turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, roasted Brussels Sprouts, a bunch of veggies and tons of miscellaneous fun stuff. I've already made stock from the bones (like this) and my first batch of soup, Classic Turkey Noodle. I hope to share [...] -
I'm so sorry I've been slacking in the Thanksgiving recipe department. I feel like a bad food blogger. Everyone else is posting festive ideas and here I've gone missing for a few days. Maybe it's because I'm not doing anything special for Turkey day. I finally got my holiday cooking [...]
About Roni
Roni started this blog in '05 to journal her weight loss. 70lbs later, she's committed to living a conscious, healthy life and hopes to inspire others along the way. Read more on the about page.
Yes, that pretty much sums up my mindset change too. Losing weight and being healthy is all in the head. I can exercise, I can eat healthy one day at a time, I can make choices that better my self image and quality of life.
I found this website when I joined WW 4 and a half months ago – since then I have lost 32.8 pounds. Thanks Roni!
OMG..May I copy that quote?..I know there will be a million times I can reflect on it..Roni..I am about 20 years older than you,,your wisdom never ceases to amaze me..what you just put in layman’s terms above, hits the nail..directly on the head..Perfectly written..and perfectly understood…BRAVO.. and as always Thank you……
Roni,
Once it again, your post sounds like something I would have wrote. Sometimes it feels like you can read my thoughts and fears.
I really never attempted to really lose the weight. I never gave it my full effort. Once I did, I got the results that I was looking for. Now I am training for my first half marathon. Who would have thought that this overweight unactive girl would now be 50 pounds lighter and attempting to run 13.1 miles? Crazy.
Good luck on your training! Thanks again for the great post.
Kristen
this is Anna aka AnnaBanana, thanks Roni for using MY question-of-the-week idea! i tihink it was meant more as a rhetorical food-for-thought question rather than wanting a specific “answer” to something. and you took it and ran with it beautifully! THANKS so much for all you do for your readers.
I love that quote! It really hit home with me. If success is nothing but being a size 6 or weighing x pounds, then I wouldn’t be successful until the morning I woke at the size/weight. But, in truth, the success really does happen when I get up and do something. I’m successful because I got up and ran a few miles, because I didn’t cave in to eating everything in sight, because I’m taking charge and changing my habits – not because of a number on the scale. And, really, when I do reach my goal weight, I think the far bigger success will be all the changes I made and the things I got up and tried and did. So we really do succeed as soon as we try.
Check out Laura Janes last blog post..Warning: Discouraging Post
I’m only afraid of my success when I have low self esteem. As of late, I’ve had more self esteem and I’m excited for all that is possible. Mind power is an amazing thing. If you ever hear a famous athlete talk about how they broke a world record, or won a gold metal they talk a lot amount mental imagery. Visualizing yourself succeeding.
Can you picture your self sprinting that last ¼ mile to the finish line, or pulling up your skinny jeans and zipping them up, benching 115 again, coaching a soccer team, competing in a triathlon, raising $100,000 for charity, publishing your first book, selling your first piece of art, going out with out all the worries, and better yet…spending a day learning how to surf, and catching your first wave.
Now I need to go visualize myself getting a work out done today, and go do it.
Check out Fitness Surfers last blog post..What I Want More Is…
Great Post! It’s so true that a big factor in weight loss and living healthy is your mindset.
Check out Runeatrepeats last blog post..Donde Esta?
Very true! In my 10 years in the circus we would have to do push-ups or some other punishment when we said we couldn’t do something. The reality was our trainers would never ask us to do something we weren’t ready to try. I did the same thing when my students would use the word can’t. It’s really a hindering word. When you say it enough you will eventually believe it. By making it a forbidden word you gain confidence because it leaves you having to TRY. thanks for posting, such a good reminder to banish this word more!
so true.
in all aspects of life.
now why am I paralyzed and not trying? need to make that my SUNDAY MUSING IN MY HEAD…
Check out MizFits last blog post..We interrupt your Saturday for the MizFit Commenter O’The Month (DRUMROLL PLEASE):
How bad am I that I read the title of this entry as “Weekend Quiche”?
Thanks for this reminder. I say I “can’t” way too much. I’m making it a point to examine that when I say or think it. I’ll be interested to see where that takes me.
I think part of the problem is that in today’s society we all want a quick fix, we want things NOW and not later after much hard work, dedication and faith.
But to help myself believe in what I once thought I could never do I think smaller. And I remember the old tale of the tortise and the hare. Who won the race????
Slow and steady – it’s the only way.
Hey Roni,
First time here, great quote! Great mindset as well. It happens to me all the time. I have this bad habit of getting stuck in a certain “right” and “wrong” ways of attaining a particular goal. THe more we stick to a particular mindset that more we’re moving away from our potential. To attain our potential, we need to be using a variety of tools in our toolbox.
I love this post! I totally agree with your quote! :)
Check out Tinas last blog post..English Muffin Pizzas
P.S. LOVE the CommentLuv feature! So cool!
Check out Tinas last blog post..English Muffin Pizzas
Goals and a positive attitude are important. I decided it was time for me to set some goals. I have gone on for a while now without a set goal in mind.
Check out Christys last blog post..I’m So Vain…
Thanks for all the positive posts! I always end up back here to get motivated. I’ve signed up for a 5k! Thanks Roni!
Very nice thank you!