"… but I have to work so hard at it."
Someone said that to me today in a discussion about weight loss. I don’t think she reads my blog so she has no idea of my personal weight history but I have to laugh at the statement 1.) because I used to say it, 2.) because it implies that people who don’t have a weight problem don’t have to "work for it".
I used to think that there were "lucky" and "unlucky" people when it came to body size. I was one of the unlucky ones. I would say things like, "Just looking at food, I gain 5 pounds" and "I’m just big boned." I’m not about to say everyone has the potential to be a certain size or look a particular way but what I want to focus on are ‘excuse statements’ like these. Let’s be honest, they are excuses, at least they were for me. Actually they were more then excuses they were a way for me to rationalize being and eating unhealthy.
So back to this statement, when she said it I felt a tinge of "Don’t talk to me about weight missy, look at you, you’re skinny." I may be wrong, I often am, but even though she didn’t say it that’s how I interpreted her tone. Am I really the person in the gym that makes other people wonder why I’m there. Me? I’m the one that they think doesn’t have to work at keeping the fat off?
WOW – I can’t believe it. I really can’t.
In all seriousness, I know there are people who are blessed with better metabolisms then others, there are some who don’t have the emotional connection with food and still others that are happy no matter what size they are. But by saying "it’s hard for you" you are implying it’s not hard for others. And the fact is… it IS hard for most. When you see a thin person don’t assume they didn’t have to work for it. Assume they work their ass of for it! They probably do! They probably skip dessert or (and this was novel idea for me) stop eating when they are full. They may workout, or take the stairs more then the elevator. They may even hate the body they are in just like I used to.
My point here is you can’t compare or make assumptions about other peoples bodies. Even if they are a freak of nature and have the ability to eat anything they want and never gain an ounce they may have other burdens to bear that you are completely unaware of.
Sometimes you’ll look up and see planes in the sky,
And you’ll think to yourself, "I wish I could fly."
The cars on the roads will seem quick and free—
You’ll feel stuck on your track and think, "I wish that was me."
But the plane might wish he could get out of the air.
Saying, "I wish I could travel like that train down there."
The cars will watch as your speed right along.
And they’ll say to each other.
"Look how fast and how strong!"
Don’t worry about not being a car or a plane,
Just enjoy the trip you’ll take as a train.
Yes ladies and gentleman, tears are now streaming down my face. I cannot read that without getting emotional. I just think it’s important for us to realize that we only need to be concerned with US. Set your OWN goals, love who YOU are and just make the best decisions you can. You never know, people may look at you with envy for the things you have in your life.
Somehow this just became much more then about weight loss for me but I think you get my point. At least I hope you do. It’s funny how a statement from one person can strum up all these feelings for me.
Just remember to enjoy the trip you’re on as a train.