One Mom’s Journey from Fat to Skinny to Confident

JOURNAL

How Amazing… – The Saga Continues

38 Comments 1818 views

I’m not devoting any more energy to this conversation. It’s not worth it. I leave you with this link…

oops by CarrieP

Have no idea what I’m talking about? Here’s the original post, and the follow up.



Leave a comment

I’d love to hear your story or thoughts on mine.

However, to prevent the massive amounts of spam I was receiving I have turned off comments on any post older than 5 days old. If you'd like to leave me a note regarding this post or anything really try me on twitter (@RoniNoone,) my Facebook page, or even IG (@RoniNoone) I'm so sorry for the inconvenience. I never thought I'd have to do this but it's gotten way out of hand and comment management has become simply too time consuming to manage.

Discussion

There are 38 comments so far.

    Jackie

    July 9, 2008

    Hey Roni-
    I have been following your site for many many months now…love it! I have never left a comment until now on this or any blog…until now
    When you posted the first comment there was no link to the author. I, my sister and my friend who all read your post said…I guarantee the person that wrote it is fat and unhappy. (being both at one time I feel I can say that) and sure enough….she is clearly both. Sorry…as my grandmother always said “sometimes the truth hurts because it should”. Roni, you are such a genuine inspiration to so many people including me. You made the right decision not to reply anymore with her…I read some of her posts, she sounds like an angry, defensive, lonely, bitter person. YOu on the other hand are a bright spot to my day!!!

    Melissa

    July 9, 2008

    Roni – for what it’s worth, I read her blog. What an idiot! Here’s my response to her:

    I’ve read Roni’s blog for over a year. I have never once thought she was pushing a “Skinny” lifestyle. She is all about being healthy. While you do have a different opinion (one I can’t make sense of) and I acknowledge that, I think your are completely ignorant in the fact that being healthy is better for you than carrying around extra body FAT. Not only physically but mentally. If you are happy with high cholestrol, blood pressure and diabeties, I say, keep doing what you’re doing. If you’re happy being miserable and depressed, good for you! Don’t bring others down by spewing your bad attitude and jealously of other people’s accomplishments. In the words of my five year old, you’re MEAN! Maybe you should really look at yourself before you judge others!

    I think you have an awesome and valuable site. Keep up the good work!
    Melissa

    Kris

    July 9, 2008

    WOW! I guess some people do have two faces! I think its hysterical that you found that and she thinks she had the last laugh. I was also at the “accept yourself for what your are” phase a few years ago, but while watching my family members go through the complications that obesity can cause, I dont want that for my life!! I would rather count those points in that tortilla than count the insulin to put in a syrynge when I get diabetes because I CHOSE not to count those points/ calories/ fat grams or whatever. So to answer her question….YES, there is more to life than that….its called health. She should try it!

    Susan

    July 9, 2008

    Wow! How very sad! You can just see it in her face. Then you read a little bit of her blog and see the post about how she only takes pictures of her face. Ah……understanding sets in. You are right Roni; it is time to just let it go and write it off as a bad experience. I’m not losing weight to be a happier person; I want to be a healthier person. Your site is a tool to help me do that. Thanks for all you do – for your encouragement – for your great recipes – and for putting up with crap like this!

    Farah

    July 9, 2008

    OMG.. Roni, Im sorry you have to put up with this…
    you know, I honestly believe that all it is, is the gree monster.. those who cannot achieve greatnessin thier lives cannot stand it when they see others achiving greatness in thier’s. It’s so sad to see that instead of taking the core message of your story and this great site, she totally twisted it. I hope that future readers take from this blog whjat i have taken: To give ourselves the “HEALTHIEST SELF” we possibly can… you can be as healthy an individual at 100lb as you can be at 200lb… aslong as it’s HEALTHY! and thats the POINT! you have not once stated that you are doing this to make us all skinny and therefore happy…

    let me just say… three weeks ago… i discovered your site… and i was 151lb… and now.. because i take your receipes… and have noted down what i eat… i find that i’m living a more aware life… I appreciate flavour… and freshness in food.. ALREADY… and I saw the scale go down to 149.. its funny because i’ve never been in the 140somthing range in FOREVER…

    so thank you.. please dont let this one sad soul bring you down…
    you have all of us to take care of :)

    ~ Farah

    M

    July 9, 2008

    Don’t let her get to you Roni. There will always be jealous haters out there.

    In response to Jackie – I don’t think calling someone fat is nice no matter what they have said.

    Allison K

    July 9, 2008

    This really pisses me off. I thought she was genuinely offering another perspective as well (which is why I tried to dissect her message). I clearly thought wrong as her perspective was laced with domineering judgment. What really gets me is she makes a totally unfounded claim that your site is an “appalling example of how rampant body hatred is in this country” – which couldn’t be further from the truth! It’s about being healthy, active, and at the simplest – making better choices about what we put into our bodies.

    I’d rather have whole grains in my 1 point tortillas than a spoonful of lard. Her choice most likely being the latter. I sure hope she can take what she dishes.

    Deb

    July 9, 2008

    Holy Cow, Roni. I’ve been reading your site for over a year now and you’ve helped me through some of my darkest days when my husband is out to sea serving in the Navy and I’ve been trying to keep my 70 lbs off. I LOVE YOUR SITE!! Keep doing what you’re doing. She’s so miserable and unhappy that she’s trying to steal your joy. So sad.
    Much love sent your way!
    ps I love your videos with the toddler. I have two toddlers (boys: 3 and 4) and they are just like him! ha ha
    DebC

    Liz

    July 9, 2008

    In response to M, Carrie P prefers to be called fat… if you read some of her entries, she talks about fat acceptance and how she doesn’t appreciate it when her therapist refers to fat people as heavy set individuals. She would actually preferred to be called fat. She was trying to promote a particular lifestyle (fat acceptance) in her comments to Roni. Sadly, she herself can’t accept that there are many different lifestyle choices and unlike Roni, she is doing it in a negative, deceptive way (rather than in the positive, realistic fashion that Roni promotes her lifestyle). If nothing else, she probably has a few more hits on her blog over this than anything else. I truly don’t believe that she has won anything and I don’t think anyone is going to take away anything positive from her words, once they read her “real” thoughts on the whole discussion.

    Laurel

    July 9, 2008

    How about we all die young of diabetes complications, heart attacks, cancer, etc.? How many studies have been published showing that obesity heightens these things?

    When I went back to WW, it was because of a nightmare I had. In the dream, I had diabetes and could NEVER eat any of the desserts that I loved–for the rest of my life. I realized the next morning that in my desire to be happy eating whatever junk I wanted, I was still making a trade-off: tons of desserts now in exchange for none later. My doctor was already warning me about diabetes.

    So I decided to make the same trade-off, but to do it on a weekly basis, so that I can enjoy dessert for the rest of my life. Yeah, I’m momentarily unhappy when I have to turn away the cheeseburger or the tiramisu or whatever I used to eat every meal. But I am doing this in order to be happy the rest of my life and avoid making my own unhappiness for decades to come.

    Missy

    July 9, 2008

    Hi Roni – I applaud you not only on your weight loss but your new healthy lifestyle! I think anyone that takes the time and initiative to create this great website to not only help you along your journey but hopefully may inspire others deserves all the praise she is given. I came across your website by accident in search of healthy family friendly recipes. I now frequent your website daily for healthy ideas. For someone to put down you and your goals and the goals of your reader’s blows my mind. Negativity is such an awful thing and while there is dangerous dieting out there I have come across nothing but creative healthy lifestyle changes on your website. This person needs to realize dieting is not always a vanity thing and there are such things out there as diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure and the list goes on and on. I think this is a sad sad person with a very distorted look on life if she is putting down someone for posting about exercise goals and healthy eating. I wish you the best and thank you for all the wonderful recipes!

    alexa

    July 9, 2008

    She is a complete idiot! You totally busted her too, I LOVE it!!! I echo what everyone before me has said. You inspire me everyday and I have read your blog 4-5 times a week for over a year. YOU ARE MY HERO!!! Thanks for spreading your knowledge about living a healthy happy lifestyle!!

    Fatinah

    July 9, 2008

    I’m surprised that you’re all so angry with this gal. Not all comments are going to be positive, and she clearly has issues – perhaps if we showed a bit of kindness, she’d have a more positive experience to take away with her after her experience on this blog…..we sort of look like angry hungry people! (HAHAHAHA)

    Roni – I do have a huge appreciation and admiration for the time you take to get back to your readers (even the ones who don’t like your site like this gal). Your energy never ceases to amaze and inspire me!

    Sabine

    July 9, 2008

    Well, I’ve been overweight and I’ve been slim and, as shallow as it may sound to some, I was happier when I was slim. Way happier.

    M

    July 9, 2008

    Liz – thanks for that info. I didn’t waste my time reading Carrie’s blog so I wasn’t aware of that.

    gottahavefaith

    July 9, 2008

    You’re a class act, Roni. You did the right thing, regardless of how the conversation turned out. Keep it up. I think that keeping up such a positive atmosphere on a blog without constantly banning commentors may be an even bigger accomplishment than losing 70 lbs–you’re amazing.

    I don’t really like the mean-spirited tone that some of these comments are taking on. Defending Roni? Great! Sign me up! Judging another person? Calling her fat, miserable, and unhealthy? Not my cup of tea. I think we should take a look at Roni’s classy response and try to respond in kind.

    Kate

    July 9, 2008

    I have never been to a blog as genuine as yours. I know you are so busy… and you took the time to answer a personal email of mine. You have true character and I don’t even know you! You are an inspiration and deserve everything you have worked so hard for. Keep going… when I need a little push, I come to this site! Thanks!

    mamarabbit

    July 9, 2008

    I have been reading your site for at least the past year and look forward to it everyday….I do not think that you are promoting being skinny as opposed to being fat….I think you are trying to be healthy…I have been fat and unhappy…thin and unhappy…and healthy and happy…Notice I did not say thin and happy…I think when you start investing in yourself and thinking more of yourself and taking steps to being more healthy, you tend to be more positive….And the best I ever felt was when I exercised and ate really well…and it showed in every aspect of my life…And I think that is what Roni is doing and just trying to do her best day to day and give ideas of what she likes and doesn’t like, what works for her and what doesn’t….She did not start this website for anyone but herself…And I applaude her for her honesty about how she feels

    Katie

    July 9, 2008

    I think she is a little bit sad and unhappy in her life, and is trying to justify herself by putting down others.

    Roni, you’re an inspiration and I check your blog every day – and get so excited when there is a new post! Not because I am “obsessed” with being thin, but because I like your humor and enjoy your ideas.

    Keep up the good work!!

    roni

    July 9, 2008

    Thank you so much!! When I posted her original comment I thought it was a good way to start a conversation. You guys are right, those that read my blog know what I’m all about so I don’t know why I let this one comment get out of hand.

    I will never lie that my intention was to “get skinny” but as you guys know I learned so much about my self on that journey that it became SO much more then that. Hmmm I think I just got an idea for the Question of the Week!!

    All of that being said, let’s ease up a bit on her a bit. I know how these comments can hurt and I think she knows how we all feel about the topic and the situation.

    Ok, I am waisted more energy on this!!

    Viv

    July 9, 2008

    Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Deep breath, deep breath. Feeling better, better, better. Okay, I can speak (write).
    Roni, what you have accomplished is no easy feat. Know that you have inspired so many to be proactive in their own lives and above all, I feel that your blog promotes balance and healthy living far more than ‘being skinny.’ THis is your journey and what an unselfish thing you do to let us come along for the ride so that we might gain inspiration and hope.

    Melissa

    July 9, 2008

    Roni,
    I have never posted on your website and haven’t visited in a while. I am so sorry for what has happened. I just wanted to say how I appreciate what you do here! Thank you and God Bless!

    ksislak

    July 10, 2008

    Hey Roni~

    I just want to give you a big hug right now. I feel like I know you (as I’m sure everyone else does) and I bet that exchange of emails really got to you, especially reading her blog. She is nothing more than a miserable, hopeless person. Instead of being a mean-spirited jerk she should have read your blog and joined the community. She surely would have benefited from your support along with the support from the other members. When Carrie, or people like her get you down, just think of all the people you’ve helped. Roni, you may not realize this but you are truly saving lives. I was hopeless and heading down a road of pizza, cheeseburgers and ice cream…then I found your page. Your support along with the Blog to Lose members have really turned me around. I actually ran my first 5K a couple weeks ago!! I’ve really counted on your blog as a crutch to pull me through. You are unbelieveably talented and amazing. There are at least 834 that would agree with me. Don’t let that one get you down. I can’t wait to see whaat you post next on greenlitebites.com!!!

    ***hugs***

    Sonia

    July 10, 2008

    Like Roni said, lets ease up on this already! Like I replied to Carrie, It’s a personal choice! She chooses to be fat, we choose not to. We strive to stay slim, we fight hard to loose the weight and are not ready to give up. We need to let each other live and not be judgmental. I’m not siding with her at all, but giving her mean offensive remarks are just going to give her more reasons to stand her ground.

    Arlene

    July 10, 2008

    I can’t quite remember when I started reading Roni’s blog, but I do know I’ve never noticed her pushing anyone to be skinny.

    Sure, she promotes healthy choices, and gives us the tools and encouragement to make choices that will make us healthier, happier and, yes, probably thinner … but her focus is on finding balance, not on the number on the scale. It’s not her fault that when you finally strike the right balance in your life, you’re likely to drop weight!

    Amanda

    July 10, 2008

    After a two-year struggle with anorexia (in which I learned the caloric values of almost every food I’ve heard of, along with the health pros/cons of each), I’m recovered and happy. I did bad things to my body, and I fully wish no one has to go through that herself/himself. But I have all that info running around in my head still, so I’m hoping to do like Roni and get out there and spread a healthy message after college.

    Roni’s blog, to me, is about maintaining a healthy weight, yes, but it’s about *so* much more. It’s about being able to walk, run, jump, carry your toddler, etc. I was 100 pounds, but I couldn’t climb stairs. Now I’m training for a marathon, and I stick to WW when I want to drop a little body fat instead of not eating. It’s all about the health, and I support Roni’s efforts to get out in the world and help people understand that.

    And about the tortillas? Notice how she emphasized both low-point AND whole grain? That’s about health and weight maintenance together, which I would say makes for a pretty kick-butt tortilla.

    P.S.: Ryan’s going to grow up to be the most well-adjusted eater ever, and I really wish we could all raise our kids so well.

    Jo

    July 10, 2008

    I came across your site at the beginning of my recent weight loss and healthy lifestyle makeover. (I have lost 10 lbs and am training for a 5k). I am involved in advocacy work and decided to make a lifestyle change because I was out of shape and overweight. I didn’t have the energy to do the work I’m passionate about. I feel so much better now that I am living well and taking care of myself.

    It always baffles me when people preach about accepting yourself as you are (fat and all) because although it might seem mentally healthy to stop beating yourself up, it does not change the fact that being overweight comes with health risks (some of which can be very serious). We know that an unhealthy lifestyle can lead to type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular complications and hypertension. Accepting the extra pounds is gambling with your well being.

    No one should make you feel bad about sharing your lifestyle change and promoting healthy eating. It’s hard for us to make a difference in the world if we don’t make our health a priority.

    roni

    July 10, 2008

    All, again I appreciate the feedback, flattery and compliments. I’m glad my actual message is being received!

    However I commented this on Carrie’s blog and it needs to be said again…

    Name calling and pointing fingers is not going to get us anywhere. Carrie said her peace, I said mine. She and others feel one way, we feel another, that is the way of the world.

    This all started because of a simple comment that tried to present a point of view in a sarcastic mean spirited way. If we all said our peace without putting others down we would get SO MUCH MORE ACCOMPLISHED. We can educate people insulting them.

    Carrie’s initial message and point was skewed because of her “tone” and now ours is being clouded my mean spirited comments. Please stop the name calling it’s uncalled for.

    Alisha

    July 10, 2008

    Roni, I know you are doing the right thing….I really just don’t think she is happy with herself and we can’t fight to win her own battle. Here is my comment on her site!

    Just because I count calories and exercise doesn’t mean that I don’t accept myself as I am and that I don’t have “self-love and acceptance”. In fact, it means that I love myself and my family so much that I want to win over diabetes and heart disease that has killed so many of my near and dear relatives. I don’t think it is fair to my children to have them and then kill myself from overeating and eating bad foods all because I didn’t love myself enough to take care of my body. That doesn’t mean that I’m a fanatically crazed person about it….if you know me you’d know different. Roni’s site gives me great recipe ideas (so I guess we should ban all recipe sites because they are focused on food), exercise ideas (and again we should ban exercise sites) because it is implied that because we take care of our bodies and minds, we just don’t have self-love and acceptance. I hope this lets you in a little on the reasons why I choose to do what I do and helps you understand me a little better. Peace!

    Alisha

    Leticia

    July 10, 2008

    Grrr, I’m so angry you even gave her a mention on your blog. I hate that we all wasted time even reading her point of view. And, I bet she’s getting the most hits she’s ever gotten today from the legion of Roni Fans. You da bomb girl! We love you.

    Rosa

    July 10, 2008

    Hey Roni,

    So I never leave you comments…more of a lurker, but I hope you know that what you are doing is great. I know her post upset you and its easy to let the negativity get to you, but please know that you have a lot of people out there cheering you on and applauding your efforts. I recently lost 40 pounds and ran my first 8k and it really made me smile reading about your 5k run. Keep it up! There will always be haters.

    Amy

    July 10, 2008

    I AGREE WITH RONI- ease up on Carrie. It should be clear that everyone is at different points in their journeys. A few months ago I was eating mostly fastfood, regular cokes, and the highest fat stuff you can find everyday. At that point, I would have said that I don’t care about making changes and that I am ok how I am. I convinced myself of that because it made it easier for me to live with myself. That was the reality. When I decided that I need to get healthier both for my sake and for my children- suddenly I became responsible. I was looking in the mirror ready to face a challenge that i knew would be hard, but was ultimately the healthiest best thing for me. I think when you aren’t ready for that yet- when you JUST AREN’T THERE yet- you can’t relate to how serious people get about this lifestyle change (the food, calories, excercise, etc). In fact, when you are in the rut that I am referring to, it’s actually annoying to hear others talk about food, calories, etc. I have been there, I totally understand. On the flip side, once you’ve fully committed and engaged in the process, it’s like your life has been renewed with purpose and you have a new sense of control that you’ve never experienced before.

    I have to say that I have almost attained my goal weight and I have never felt better. But it’s not even the weight that I am most proud of- it’s the lifestyle I have adopted that genuinely feels so much better!!

    Again, I understand where Carrie is at. It is obvious to me the exact stage she is in because I would venture to say before you start the process, we’re all there. I think she would fire up like the rest of us if she, herself, were to dive in too!!! When you really commit- the gains (tangible and intangible) are so worth it!

    :)it’s all good~
    amy

    Zoe

    July 10, 2008

    Dear Roni,

    Good for you for trying to keep it positive and just plain stopping it when it got bad. Talk about things we learn from losing weight (how to stop a bad thing before it gets out of hand). We all want to feel good in the skin we have and that does not mean that we all want to be 105lbs that is not what most of us want, what we want is to be health, happy, live longer… I could go on and on, but I will not.

    Thank you for your blog and keep up the good work!

    Tara

    July 10, 2008

    As usual, the person criticizing is fat and unhappy. or maybe she has convinced herself that shes happy. people who read weightloss blogs aren’t people that hate their bodies, but generally love their bodies and love learning more about taking care of themselves. its pretty sad she goes seeking out health and weightloss blogs to start fake conversations on . and to carriep, i personally weigh 135 lbs and am 5’6″ and a sz 6, so no, i’m not some miserable fat woman whining to roni about how i love her and wish i could lose weight, but cant. i love reading ronis blog b/c she cares about her health and so do i!

    Tara

    July 10, 2008

    after reading my post, i realize how harsh i came off and am basically no better than anyone else who criticizes others. please forgive me and delete if possible!

    Joan

    July 10, 2008

    Jealousy is a crutch. – C. Astrid Weber

    she’s just jealous. you’re awesome roni.

    Paige

    July 11, 2008

    Geez, look at what happens when I miss a week of blog postings! I’m completely in awe that she felt the need to come over here and post a rude comment, then go to her blog and gets shocked that people post rude items there.

    It did get out of hand on both sides, but it has made for an interesting start to my day of catching up on blogs ;-)