One Mom’s Journey from Fat to Skinny to Confident

WEEKLY QUESTIONS

Do you ever just feel FAT?

51 Comments 4732 views

Weekly questionThat’s right, I said it, FAT! Oh boy do I feel fat right now. Three days of over indulgence in Atlantic City will do that to you. I wouldn’t say I ‘ate’ my way through vacation but I sure did increase my carb and fat intake with the fancy meals, decadent desserts and wine, oh the WINE! I did chose grilled veggie sandwiches over burgers and I split those desserts with the husband but man was I stuffed two nights in a row.

By day three I could feel myself getting fatter. My logical brains says “there’s no way you can gain 10 pounds in one day. I mean come one, you ARE wearing the same clothes.” However, the emotion side says, “Oh My GOD! I’ve gained 10 pounds. What did I do? Why oh Why did I eat that?!? What can I eat now, I’ve already ‘ruined’ the day.”

So as I sit here, I can’t lie, I feel fat. I know I’m not fat. I also know that these are the feelings that started my weight and body image problems in the first place. I need to accept what I ate. Recognize that I made some choices in the moment that were fun and tasted good but may have not been the healthiest and THAT’S OK. That’s LIFE. However, if I want to take back my confidence and feel good about myself then my diet has to return to it’s now normal state and NOW!

Yes, I’m talking myself through this right now. Yes, I still struggle with these feelings and I’m going to make the assumption that I’m not alone.

Sooo, I ask…

Do you ever just feel fat? In what situations? and how do you pull yourself out of the “feeling fat” funk?




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Discussion

There are 51 comments so far.

    Nicole

    July 29, 2008

    I always feel fat when TOM comes to visit. I know it’s water weight, but I still feel fat and that makes me want to eat more. I feel like all the hard work I might have done the week before is out the window. It’s a vicious cycle. I’m trying to work on talking myself through it each month and remember that the scale will go back down eventually if I stay on program and drink LOTS of water.

    Maria

    July 30, 2008

    I have feeling fat funks every couple of weeks…its like the plague it over takes me.

    azelma

    July 30, 2008

    Ugh, the “feel” versus “know” conundrum! It is the worst, and makes my anxiety raise like CRAZY!

    Nicole S

    July 30, 2008

    Right now I feel that way only because I haven’t “journaled” for a few days, and I have been ok, but not great, about my food. Don’t get me wrong I’m not out eating Krispy Kremes and Big Macs but at this point if I ate that would I feel even fatter that I do now? And all I have had were a few too many “low fat” treats. For me it is the working out and WATER. I know I have not been good about either and girl, it can make you fee like a beached whale when you are not moving and BLOATED. Arrgghhhh….tomorrow is a new day. Tonight however I may still need to have one more treat. Cheers.

    Laura Brandon

    July 30, 2008

    I’ve definitely had the “I feel FAT” moments, but they seem to be completely random. Well, unless I’ve eaten too much, then that’s obvious, but you know how sometimes you can just look in the mirror, and think, yeuch? Those never have any rhyme or reason to them.

    Courtney

    July 30, 2008

    I always “feel fat” when I have to get dressed up to go somewhere I really don’t want to go! I can be wearing the same outfit that I just wore last week, but on those days, I don’t know what it is… I feel like I gained 15 pounds while I was sleeping. But I have got a new “motto” that gets me through my morning routine, when I look in the mirror and my sleeves are too tight, or my shirt is hugging all of my “favorite” parts, I look at myself, smile and say – “It is what it is.” And then I refuse to go back to the mirror. Darn the “fat moment” fairy… go away…

    Crazylady

    July 30, 2008

    Oh my God, I feel like that so often! What kills me is how hard it is to rememeber in the moment that I’m just bloated or it’s mainly in my head. I suffer alot from water retention so I end up feeling fat and just plain huge al ot. I think also if I’m honest I really haven’t found a way to deal with it yet but I’m working on it. Not rushing to my comfort foods to push the feeling away and make it worse at the same time is the first step for me to learn.

    I do suspect that ensuring I get enough water in me and not overdoing it on the carbs helps lots too.

    Christy

    July 30, 2008

    I think it is normal for me to feel fat. The unusaual feeling for me is when I feel skinny. That rarely happens but I love when it does. I agree with Courtney about getting dressed up. That usually helps me to feel a little fatter than normal. I think it is because my special dress up clothes are limited to a smaller amount than my regular clothes. So I might only have 1-2 nice dresses and a couple of skirts/slacks outfits for special occasions. I do not buy or up date those clothes as often as my regular stuff. So if I am putting on a dress that I have not worn in months I might find it does not fit as good as it used too. Then …after realizing my butt has gotten bigger again…I sigh and find something else to wear. I must say I have gotten pretty creative when stuff does not fit right. I mix and match to find stuff that still fits…haha. (you can see that I really need to stick to the diet…right?)

    vickie

    July 30, 2008

    dressing room mirrors – don’t know what it is about them – mirror at home can be fine – but put me in a tiny room full of mirrors and the FAT FEELING comes.

    Shawnda

    July 30, 2008

    I always feel fat when I am on my period. I have had a few weekends I have ate my way through. (especially when going out of town) but I just get right back to eating healthy once home and I usually dont weigh myself for a few days to give my body a chance to get back on track and most times the scale is pretty merciful.

    MizFit

    July 30, 2008

    love this post as I KNOW that the dietitian/therapists out there would yell at us that FAT ISNT A FEELING but, ya know, SOME DAYS IT IS!!

    M.

    Cintia

    July 30, 2008

    I used to feel fat all the time. Now, not that much. Before my body transformation began my mind had to be changed. I’m usually not exercising that much when these ‘i’m fat’ feelings return. In my experience they all boil down to self condemnation. Love has to be the main feeling in order for me to have a successful weight loss experience :) awesome question! it got me thinking!

    Kristen

    July 30, 2008

    YES!!!!!!!!! I have founds that my episodes of feeling fat come after too much indulgence. I believe that indulgence in moderation on occasion is fine as long as I get right back on program. (Like your plan on vacation) If I stick to program and follow what I know then I don’t feel as fat. Thanks Roni!

    Michelle

    July 30, 2008

    Oh boy…do I ever feel fat!! I had my 2nd baby, a beautiful girl, only 3 1/2 months ago and I’m only 10 pounds from my WW goal weight. Every one says I look great, but I look in the mirror and see pudge all over the place!
    I’m moderately working the WW plan, but need to get back to a meeting.

    Going to buy clothes has been a nightmare, because I’m unwilling to buy bigger clothes (I was size 6/8 before she arrived) and though I’m no where near the size 16 I was after my son was born (almost 4 years ago), I still feel FAT!!!

    It’s definitely a feeling that comes and goes…hopefully it goes away soon!!

    Fit Bottomed Girls

    July 30, 2008

    Yea, I think most women do. Call it bloat or just a monthly practical joke, one day a month I always feel huge. All I do is remind myself that it’s my one fat-feeling day of the month, put on some roomy clothes, do some yoga or something to relax and go about my day.

    Thank goodness it never lasts too long!

    Angela

    July 30, 2008

    Believe me, I understand the feeling. I feel fat when I’m wearing certain clothes. I even felt fat on my wedding day, but it didn’t stop me from enjoying the day!

    I find that if I drink lots of cold water with a bit of lemon (the lemon adds flavor and acts as a diuretic), eat nice, light foods (think white fish, a bit of ww couscous and some veggies), the feeling passes in a day or 2.

    Just hang in there for a couple of days!

    Kim

    July 30, 2008

    I too feel fat alot. I don’t what it is but there is days you wake up and feel my god what happened while I was sleeping. I can wake up feel fat but the good thing is the scale does not move. I feel just bluh like I gained 10 lbs. What is it anyway the sleep fat fairy that gets us while we sleep?

    I have lost 50 lbs and I am 2 pds from goal but I am just stuck for months trying to lose those same 2 lbs. I guess I should not complain because this summer I have been more off target than I like and I have only battled those 2 pds. I am trying to get back on target this week with writing everything down and just started back on my exercise program. Maybe, the fat fairy will go away. But this is the first year in many years that I am wearing a two piece bathing suit ..woohoo. Weight loss is an everyday battle but man it feels good when you have those days you actually feel good on the inside. Thanks for the inspiration Roni..

    Erin

    July 30, 2008

    I just stepped on the scale and it read 160 this morning. I have lost 34 lbs. since March doing WW. But when I look in the mirror or just look at my body, I feel fat. It has really made me realize how fat I was. Don’t get me wrong, I feel great with what I have accomplished, but I still have a ways to go.

    Alisha

    July 30, 2008

    Right now I feel fat. GREAT TOPIC and GREAT TIMING. Every weekend this summer was some kind of function we had to go to. I did great up until last weekend at a family reunion with all the home made goodies. And now I feel fat. And I know about the feeling of gaining 10 lbs over night….but it’s TOM and my hands are so swollen that I can’t bend them together. I guess it will pass, but I know I will have at leats 5 lbs to get off after the water weight. I have to accept it too….I will try.

    Amy

    July 30, 2008

    So… I have a skewed since of my body. I have always looked in the mirror and saw a smaller person than exisits. I know I am overweight…have been since puberty… but I don’t always see the fat girl. I do feel fat when I am shopping- especially with friends or sisters who are MUCH smaller. I hate that I can’t go into a The Gap or Old Navy and pick up a pair of jeans. I also “see” my true size when I look at pictures. I don’t have the skewed mirror vision while thumbing through pictures. I have worked hard this summer to take off 15lbs- I am thrilled by it, but wonder if I could have done better… but, I still feel a little thrill when people comment or my clothes don’t fit anymore.

    Journeytoahealthyme

    July 30, 2008

    We all have I-feel-fat-days…. I get through mine by eating healthy and throwing on a pair of high heels and dancing and singing in my room. It usually lifts my mood :)

    V

    July 30, 2008

    I ALWAYS feel fat when I overindulge in salty foods, but the feeling usually takes 24 hours or so to kick in, so by the time it does, I feel like I haven’t done anything wrong and “feel fat” for no reason! If I drink lots of water and eat a lot salads, and fresh fruits and veggies for snacks in place of luna bars/crackers/nuts, it usually does the trick.

    There was a time when I had a really bad body image, wasn’t happy with where my life was, and lost around 25 lbs via deprivation, and even when I got down to around 135 lbs (I’m 5’9) I “felt fat” most of the time. But now, I weigh around 165, and I don’t feel fat all the time. It’s just because I’m happier with where my life is and I’m not solely focusing on my weight!

    terri

    July 30, 2008

    i am going through the same thing right now. i feel fat~still wearing the same clothes,but i just feel like a darn moooooo cow!!! i think we place a lot of guilt upon ourselves! i just think tomorrow is a new day, i will eat better and run a little more! glad to see there are a lot of us out there that feel the same WAY!

    Donna

    July 30, 2008

    Yes, I too have the dreaded “I feel fat” days. I’m trying hard these days to put these moments into perspective and when they happen I refocus my attention on the healthy choices I make for myself every day by reviewing my daily food, thought and exercise journal and just move on. Also, reading my favorite blogs (Roni!) helps me alot to stay positive!

    foodiegymmie

    July 30, 2008

    its kinda wierd, but i feel fat when im in office attire, and also most of the time when im inactive. i feel fit only when/after running or working out in the gym, and when im in gym attire.

    Sweets and Sweats

    July 30, 2008

    Wonderful post! I think we all have those days where we feel huge (even if we aren’t) and it is one of those feelings that no one can talk you out of despite any compliments. I think writing and simply putting it out there is the best way to deal and move past those feelings. I definitely have days where I feel fat and it is always made worse if I am feeling guilty over some sort of eating venture.

    Sweets&Sweats

    Alle

    July 30, 2008

    ha…funny you posted this. I woke up this morning feeling so hugely fat and just dirty and gross. Weird how those things go together in my mind. Anyway, surprise, surprise, I got on the scale and had lost a pound. I guess it just goes to show that your mind can really play tricks on you!

    Leticia

    July 30, 2008

    I’ve been traveling one week a month for work and on those weeks I feel so fat. It really stinks to have to eat out for 3 meals a day for one whole week. Just when I start to get on track, I have to leave again. Every time I get back, I feel fat. I LOVE food, I LOVE eating out, but it just gets to be too much. I long for some “regular” home cooked food…

    Kate

    July 30, 2008

    I totally have “fat days”. Sometimes there is no cause at all, the scale says I’m the same, the clothes fit the same. I just feel kinda gross. Who knows.

    But then there are times like you stated above where I’ve overindulged, had a weekend vacation, or whatever, and I feel fat. Luckily, like yourself, I know that I can’t gain 10lbs in 2 days, but sometimes it sure feels like I did. And just like yourself, I beat myself up over the bad eating, like why the heck did I do that.

    But your right, when you have some off plan time, its done and over, and the battle of maintaining weight isn’t being perfect all the time…..just a majority of it.

    Annette

    July 30, 2008

    I have those all the time………but I am fat still! But not as fat as I was three months ago. I am down 48 lbs. I started my journey doing low carb and am now adding more whole grains. My body sometimes has a bit of a challenge adjusting. I have noticed on the evenings I include wheat like last night, veggie pizza on my homemade whole wheat crust, the next day I feel fat…but I know it’s just bloat…my body adapting to wheat again.

    Theresa

    July 30, 2008

    I’m thinking that the ‘feeling fat’ problem might be a food hang over instead? I notice a pattern when I feel fat….. it’s after I’ve indulged in stuff that I’m no longer used to eating. That fellow who ate McDonald’s for a month was not used to eating such foods. He really felt terrible. The guy who ate big macs every day and was so used to them felt great. I think when we drop in larger amounts of foods that our body is not accustomed to we get those feelings. JMHO!!

    Christie

    July 30, 2008

    I usually feel fat when I’m around my “skinny” friends. I just feel like I can’t measure up to that. My answer… I’m not sure. I just give myself a self-talk so I can realize that they are friends with me so I must have things cooler about myself than just thin-ness (which I don’t have).

    If it’s an eating day sort-of fat. I usually can get rid of it by forcing myself to calm down, drinking lots of water, and trying something new in the kitchen that’s satisfying and lite.

    Jenn

    July 30, 2008

    Roni,
    I have been back from vacation for 2 1/2 weeks now. While I was away, I too over indulged and when I got home the scale was up. But, I have been eating great and working out 4 days a week and the scale has gone down to my normal weight.

    Vacation is a great thing and I think if I was too strict, it wouldn’t have been as fun. I indulged in some wonderful seafood that you just can’t get in my home town. I’m in great shape and you are too! So what if we enjoy treats for a few days out of the year? We know how to get back on plan!

    Lynn C

    July 30, 2008

    I always feel fat. I have always felt fat.

    There’s a rather large part of my brain that says it doesn’t matter that I’ve lost 45 pounds… that I will always feel fat.

    Yes, we’re still working on that.

    Crystal

    July 30, 2008

    That’s a hard one, because I know that I am fat. Not just a feeling, but knowing that you are fat is hard. Somedays, I feel that I look good, but then I will walk by a mirror or window and I will see my gut sticking out, and that feeling goes out the window.

    I am defintely thinner than I have been in a long while, but I still have another 50 pounds to lose before I am close to a healthy range. It makes me sad and frustrated at the same time.

    I am rambling, but I do know what you mean. Even though, I am fat, there are days that I feel fatter than others. *sigh*

    Denisse

    July 30, 2008

    I do feel fat a lot. I recently started weight watchers about 3 months ago. So far i’ve lost aboiut 14 lbs. BUT i havent weighed myself in about 3 weeks. So im not too sure how im doing. I went to vegas this weekend for my 21st birthday and I didnt keep track of my points but i did watch how much i ate, however i still felt FAT and that i had eaten way too much!! im assuming it was the choice i made in what to eat. I thought to myself…”Denisse, you let go a lil this weekend, starting monday get back to keeping track of EVERYTHING you eat and watching what you eat.” My problem is getting on the scale. Im afraid to find out if I’ve failed to keep up with the program. Quite frankly I do feel that I havent been committed to it as much as i was 3 months ago :( what should i do?

    Amy

    July 30, 2008

    The fat feeling is the craziest thing and I sometimes can’t tell if indeed I look pudgy- or if it’s in my head??? I have lost 20 lbs and really only need to lose about 5 lbs to be at my personal weight goal, and STILL I wake up a lot of days and think I’m chunky. People around me say I look good- in fact, my parents tell me not to lose any more…that I look to be at a healthy weight. But because I am still shooting for those last 5 lbs and am having a hard time shaking them, it’s wearing on me and adding to the fear that I still look over weight. I definitely feel bloated/fatty on alot of days and I don’t know why (after losing most of the weight). Will this complex ever change???? Is it possible to be satisfied when you reach your goal- and can you finally “feel” slim?

    Bonnie

    July 30, 2008

    You guys……..the other day, my 75 year old mother said, “Do you ever feel fat, like you haven’t even lost any weight?”. (She has lost 50 pounds and I have lost 83 pounds in the last year!) You see……this is all just part of being a woman….it happens to ALL of us, and it doesn’t matter what age we are. It’s a constant fight inside our brains. You know how they say that the brain is the real sex organ? Well, the brain is what rules with weight gain or loss and our self perceptions and everything. If you can get your head in the right place, you can do anything. And repetitive positive reinforcement is what gets your head in the right place. That’s why Roni’s websites work so good for us. It’s also like the Bible says that “faith comes by hearing (and hearing and hearing and hearing) the Word of God”…..weight loss and positive self perceptions come by hearing (and hearing and hearing and hearing) positive things about getting healthy…etc. etc.

    Barbara

    July 30, 2008

    I definitely have days where I’ll feel fat…and to be honest, it’s not always as long as a day. I remember the other week I planned a date night for my boyfriend and I. I went into work thinking I looked super cute and by the time I was out of work and heading to his house, I felt like a hippo and I felt horrible. I actually shared that with him and he said, “But you’re the same Barbara that left the house this morning!” And he’s right…I was the same Barbara, I guess I just let my emotions get the best of me…or the lighting or something.

    As hard as we try to feel good about ourselves 24/7, I think we’re always going to have those days where we just feel unattractive. No matter what size we are…I think it’s bound to happen. We just have to remember not to let that feeling take over or we’re bound to head down a path of no return. It’s happened to me more times that I care to admit and I’m still trying to “get back on the healthy bandwagon.”

    Just remember…we’re beautiful women!!
    :)

    suzanne

    July 30, 2008

    I know this sounds weird but when i drink wine even one glass i get so bloated ;( I do enjoy approx once a week but i know i’ll retain water after for a day so i don’t even bother weighing myself. Logically i know i didn’t gain fat but i definitely still feel it!

    Runner Girl

    July 30, 2008

    I am 5’0 and 108 pounds and I feel fat right now.

    Melissa

    July 30, 2008

    I do an extra 20 min of exercise…kind of like getting ahead.

    Amy

    July 30, 2008

    Unfortunately I feel that way all the time. The way I carry my excess weight makes me look pregnant. I don’t think it would bother me as much if the weight was more disbursed.

    Tricia

    July 30, 2008

    Umm…the answer would be…am I a woman??? We all have our “Fat days” where we feel like we gained all the weight back overnight…but the truth is, we didn’t. And we won’t. So as long as we get back into gear after those indulgences, then ll is well…as you know!!!

    Amy

    July 30, 2008

    Earlier today I posted that I always feel fat. It’s not always true, just mostly. I forgot about yoga, when I do yoga I manage to completely forget that I have 40+ pounds to lose and instead feel wonderful and free. So for me it isn’t about when I feel fat it is about when I don’t feel fat and remembering what I need to do to feel that way. It’s easy to forget.

    Rebecca

    July 31, 2008

    Just got back from vaction myself, so yes I definetely know the “feeling.” I even had to try on some of my “skinny” jeans just to make sure I could get them on.

    Rebecca

    July 31, 2008

    sorry about the typos I didn’t proof read.

    Tanya

    August 2, 2008

    love this post…just got back from vacation at the cottage – did as well as I wanted to…enjoyed but didn’t totally over indulge like the last several years (that was my goal) but I feel SOOOO fat right now. I think that is a week out of routine. Whether it is a week or a few days…it makes anyone who is trying to lose weight, maintain, lead a healthy lifestyle, etc. feel fat…so here’s to getting back on track with no regrets about enjoying life.

    debby

    August 12, 2008

    Roni, I feel fat today! I know this post is from a few days ago, but I was looking back for one of your videos to watch and saw this one, and just had to comment. The thing is, I am up a few pounds, so I am fatter, but today, I made such good food choices, and even though it was hot, I went and worked out extra hard at Curves, and then I had a thing tonight at church, and I made a low-cal cake, and planned for it, but then someone brought a regular chocolate cake, and I also had not one, but two small pieces of it. It seems like more and more often I give in to this kind of thing. I feel fat tonight.

    Tonya

    April 8, 2009

    As I tell my weight loss clients, “fat is not a feeling,” even though they argue with me (and I’ve also argued with myself on this one…yes, I have “fat” days), but I’ve learned to ask myself what I’m really feeling. Usually it’s something like loss of control, sadness, or fear. Fat is only tissue, just like the table I’m propping my feet on, but boy, if any matter ever comes close to having a feeling, it would be fat.

    Thanks for sharing your journey!!

    Laura

    July 28, 2009

    Hi Roni – I had to read this post again. I am going through a bad phase – not because I am not on plan, but because I recently found out I have a thyroid problem, levels are high so it is not workng hard enough. I have been on meds for 3 weeks and I must say I feel fat every day. I can only say that I know I am doing what is right, I walk atleast 4 days a week sometimes more, and I am following my plan. (I do Jenny Craig with some meals on my own.) The other thing is that in April I changed to a new form of birth control, after being on the Pill for like 13 years (minus the time I was pregnant) I decided to get an IUD. (sorry if that was too much information – lol) I have put on like 8 lbs this year after I lost 45 last year, and it is so disheartening to me that I am feeling as though I have failed yet again at weight loss. I know I should not feel like this, I walked 7 miles for the first time in my life last week, and that was HUGE to me, I know I am doing well. I just have to give my system time to adjust to new Birth control and now having a thyroid problem.

    I just wanted to say thank you. I religiously follow your posts and you are a huge inspiration. Thanks for all that you do!